Monday, May 11, 2009
After Mother's Day
Mother's Day was not a happy day for us. It started at church. Our Pastor's wife gave the sermon, but I thought it was a bit mean spirited; even painful. She preached on Psalm 116, which is great scripture for grieving people. But, first, she was handing out flowers to women in the church who did something special or suffered loss this past year. Pastor Walt told me that Evey would receive one, but she never did. Then, Kerrie started on Psalm 116.
The only problem is that she was kind of cold. If you have a loss, just read this scripture and everything will be ok. Quit feeling sorry for yourself and give your sorrow to God. He will sustain you. Yes, this is true, but it is never that simple or easy. I hope she never experiences the loss of a child. If she does, I guarantee she won't be so self-assured. Next, she put all loss in the same category. I'm sorry, but losing a job, a grandparent, a sibling, or even a parent is nothing compared to losing a child, especially a child who depended on you for so much and was so close to you.
After church, we visited Kimmi's grave, then went home. Evey opened her gift (all the cards Kimmi ever gave Evey over the years). That helped Evey quite a bit. We talked a bit and moped around our very empty house the rest of the day. Went out to eat, then back home for more moping.
One very positive note was that Evey finally admitted that Kimmi was getting weaker and weaker the last few months. She never admitted that before. Knowing that Kimmi was getting weaker and sicker, even knowing that she was dying really helps us in that we never wanted her to suffer, especially over a period of months slowly wasting away. Knowing that she didn't suffer very long really eases the pain of her death.
The thing that really did cheer Evey up quite a bit was the phone calls from Robby and Craig. Talking to them was definitely the highlight of the day, and helped her immensely.