ICE CREAM HEADACHE

While at work last night, I got an Ice Cream headache. You know, the extreme pain you get from eating ice cream, or some other frozen item too fast. it only lasts a few seconds, but the pain is so intense that you're not sure you will live. This immediately made me think of Kimmi and helps me accept her death; even feeling relieved that her frail body passed away. I read Kimmi's last diary page. She talked about her health and her pain.
She wrote, "How about the time she was sick? Everyone knew she was sick, but no one knew how sick she really was. She kept it to herself. She didn't want people to worry. She knew she was close to the edge. She knew she couldn't take the pain anymore. She knew her brain was starting to fail. She knew she couldn't think clearly anymore. Don't cry, I'm happy now, I feel no more pain. I couldn't take it anymore. It was affecting my need and my way of thinking. I'm with God, I'm cured! It doesn't hurt anymore mommy and daddy. I'll see you guys when you get here". I love you!
Bye,
Kimberly Riedel

This is what keeps me going. Knowing that my baby was suffering so much that she couldn't think clearly, and that she knew her brain was failing, and having it proven by her MRI, helps me deal with her death in a positive way. I could never stand to see her in pain or suffer emotionly. This, and knowing that she is resting in the love of Jesus makes all this bearable.

Kimmi left us one month ago, today at 4:43 p.m., and went to rest in the arms and love of her real Father in Heaven. While we still suffer in the pain of losing our baby, we also celebrate her new life; her pain free life; her victory over death and suffering, her glorious joy of everlasting peace!

I don't know when our pain and suffering will diminish, but in some ways, I hope it never does. Hurting like this makes me feel closer to Kimmi even if I can't see her beautiful face and little pug nose, hear her making fun of me, or feel her precious little body as I kiss her forehead and tell her I love her.

Happy 1-month anniversary Baby Girl. This is just the very beginning of your timeless joy in eternity. I know you are preparing a place for us, and we will really celebrate when we see you again. To us, it will seem like forever, but to you it will only feel like a split second. Sweet dreams my little angel. I love you!
Daddy
P.S. Milli really misses you, but I take her for a walk nearly every day. She really enjoys that.